If Nov was busy busy.. Dec is just yucky at work.. softie moi can't seem to deny all the aunties their leave.. think i overgranted leave.. tits the nature of the work.. in a month where traffic peaks.. it hard for staff to go on leave.. guess its my fault too.. i misculculated and should have been more prudent.. Oh well.. been praying real hard that things will turn out well..think my boss's gonna hit the roof.. hate doing manpower deployment.. yet i wanna go into HR.. silly old moi..
Is there a blanket that i can cover myself with and pretend that nothing happened? Aiz.. 14 more days till the end of my stint.. guess its a good lesson learnt..albeit at a great price.. dun think my apprasial will be that great..hee.. oh well.. hope things will be better in Jan.. new beginnings..new year.. and i asked the dear one.. will i be a failure if i never get promoted in my entire life? and he says.. its okay.. impt is you be good wife! Hee... the girly and slack me simply melted.. but the headstrong me still laments and worries.. my gut feel is that if i stay with the org.. i will prob end up being an average performer.. no passion for the job.. and no guts to move on.. wonder if i will look back in rectrospect 30 years from now and regret not taking action? haiz.. wonder if my investments will reap wonderful returns so that i can retire early and open a cafe..
Not in much of a holiday mood till this crisis is over.. and am still thinking whether i should join Hui and Han in Phuket.. really gotta save..
Friday, December 15, 2006
Sunday, December 03, 2006
Time flies
Wow.. before I noe it.. am back from Siem Reap .. when to the co's dnd and had lots of photos taken.. spent nearly a fortune on my hair with rebonding and 5 treatments package course..and even had another mini vacation at Sentosa. Really luv Sokha hotel which I stay in at Siem Reap.. the hotel is new.. the spa is great.. the splurge was worth it mah.. think im becoming addicted to 5 star hotels.. opps.. even Rasa Sentosa which i just stay at on Sentosa was great.. can still remember the yummy strawberries from the breakfast and the platter of kueh which was in the room when we checked it.. and of course.. the breathtaking seaview from our balcony windows and the lavender toiletries provided.. luxury.. hee.. guess occasional spending is food for the soul.. hmm.. can't do it often though.. not good for overall financial health.. ;p
The dear one brought me to Il lido at Sentosa Golf Club for fine Itallian dining.. the meal was my most expensive ever.. but worth it.. We had pan fried groose liver which melts in your mouth.. lobster linguini .. diver scallopes.. beef and chocolate pudding with raspberry sorbet.. the sorbet is simply refreshing.. and my white wine was good too..yum..nearly $150 per pax.. ouch! The poor dear! And he brought me a bottle of Chanel's Chance perfume which i mentioned that i liked.. the silly one.. and a photo book of pictures of us which he made himself..so touched i am.. really.. and of course.. the shiny destinee bling which took most of his bonous.. the silly silly one.. im a lucky gal.. really.. appreciate the effort and thought.. though its a once in the life time thingy.. beautiful memories.. is wat i'll be..
hee... must really save in 2007 .. ;)
The dear one brought me to Il lido at Sentosa Golf Club for fine Itallian dining.. the meal was my most expensive ever.. but worth it.. We had pan fried groose liver which melts in your mouth.. lobster linguini .. diver scallopes.. beef and chocolate pudding with raspberry sorbet.. the sorbet is simply refreshing.. and my white wine was good too..yum..nearly $150 per pax.. ouch! The poor dear! And he brought me a bottle of Chanel's Chance perfume which i mentioned that i liked.. the silly one.. and a photo book of pictures of us which he made himself..so touched i am.. really.. and of course.. the shiny destinee bling which took most of his bonous.. the silly silly one.. im a lucky gal.. really.. appreciate the effort and thought.. though its a once in the life time thingy.. beautiful memories.. is wat i'll be..
hee... must really save in 2007 .. ;)
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Idyllic Days
Woh... Idyllic days.. these past few days.. pretty sure i've gained a few pounds with all that bingeing .. shopping and days of sleeping in..
Finally had my eyebrows trimmed and cutted my fringe.. felt better instantly. Guess often your mood is affected by your perception of self.. especially so for moi.. my sense of self at times is tagged to how good i look or perceive myself to look.. ha ha.. instant gratification.. which is why women are willing to shell out big bucks to maintain themselves.. which is hard.. for the average jane with the average salary.. style and beauty.. needs money.. aiz.. Guess i have to save up some to strighten my hair from my current curly locks.. have decided i look better in straight flat hair.. ha ha.. even my thoughts reflects my idyllic mood ;p
Went to a fantestic korean restaurant called Togi at Chinatown which i will def bring Fen, and the pastries to.. the portions are large.. the side dishes are refillable.. and the pretty lady boss served us our stonepot mixed rice with flare.. plus the price is reasonable.. Yummy.. can't wait to try the ginseng chicken soup on my next visit..
Went to Vivo City and tried out the movie theatre there too.. hee.. still a sucker for any novel or movie that has beautiful wineyards as the backdrop. Though the leading man in A Good Year is not as dashing as Keanu Reeves in A Walk in the Clouds.. but being a wine movie romance.. it'll do.. can't wait for Charlotte's web to be out.. hmm.. tis been a long time since i've watch movies.. and i thought one of my resolutions was to watch more movies?! A good form of escapism from the real world to the reel world.. :p
More shopping tom in my quest to find the perfect dress for my co's DnD at Ritz Carlton. Hope I find something nice with the limited budget that I have.. my upcoming trip to Siem Reap is taking up this whole month's savings.. hiaz.. and i've gotta go on a diet too.. the DnD's nearing.. and i'm still eating and eating.. shaiks........
Finally had my eyebrows trimmed and cutted my fringe.. felt better instantly. Guess often your mood is affected by your perception of self.. especially so for moi.. my sense of self at times is tagged to how good i look or perceive myself to look.. ha ha.. instant gratification.. which is why women are willing to shell out big bucks to maintain themselves.. which is hard.. for the average jane with the average salary.. style and beauty.. needs money.. aiz.. Guess i have to save up some to strighten my hair from my current curly locks.. have decided i look better in straight flat hair.. ha ha.. even my thoughts reflects my idyllic mood ;p
Went to a fantestic korean restaurant called Togi at Chinatown which i will def bring Fen, and the pastries to.. the portions are large.. the side dishes are refillable.. and the pretty lady boss served us our stonepot mixed rice with flare.. plus the price is reasonable.. Yummy.. can't wait to try the ginseng chicken soup on my next visit..
Went to Vivo City and tried out the movie theatre there too.. hee.. still a sucker for any novel or movie that has beautiful wineyards as the backdrop. Though the leading man in A Good Year is not as dashing as Keanu Reeves in A Walk in the Clouds.. but being a wine movie romance.. it'll do.. can't wait for Charlotte's web to be out.. hmm.. tis been a long time since i've watch movies.. and i thought one of my resolutions was to watch more movies?! A good form of escapism from the real world to the reel world.. :p
More shopping tom in my quest to find the perfect dress for my co's DnD at Ritz Carlton. Hope I find something nice with the limited budget that I have.. my upcoming trip to Siem Reap is taking up this whole month's savings.. hiaz.. and i've gotta go on a diet too.. the DnD's nearing.. and i'm still eating and eating.. shaiks........
Friday, November 10, 2006
Just fretting doing nothing
Finally got thru my black Nov... 9 free days.. and my upcoming trip to Siem Reap.. Can't believe its just next week.. the ancient beauty of the Wats in Angkor beckons... although I am never really a fan of Wats.. looking forward to my spa treat too.. although its estimated that the trip will set me back by close to $700.. 3 days 2 nights.. Phew... I gotta take some realli breathtaking photos man..
The dear one nags at me to be more frugal.. i will.. i will.. i promise.. but how's a gal to survive without retail therapy? My shopping list keeps growing by the day instead of my investment portfolio.My second posting is still unknown.. my batch mates are mostly going to welcome travellers from the skies..and I'm in 2 minds abt it.. if i do shift again, the distance will just kill moi.. but there are the monetary perks of being on shift together with the luxury of leisure time.. while going to the headquarters will be good exposure and great for career development.. but i'll be a poor church mouse.. yet the irony is.. the posting could already have been decided by some higher being upon the 9th floor.. just that its not announced yet. Aiz.. all that fretting when i got my posting option form was for naught.. for its just a meaningless paper excerise and my gut feel is that I've not been outstanding enough in my 2 years in the organisation. Hence, the urge to move on.. for a fresh start.. esp when you see your pals shining brightly in their careers or doing something they are passion about.. just can't seem to be passionate abt my job.. dah..
Shaks.. i've gotta snap out of this soon.. for what ever will be, will be. Can't help being demoralized a tat bit by the current state of things..Golly.... really gotta stop worrying abt work for the next 9 days at least.. ;p
The dear one nags at me to be more frugal.. i will.. i will.. i promise.. but how's a gal to survive without retail therapy? My shopping list keeps growing by the day instead of my investment portfolio.My second posting is still unknown.. my batch mates are mostly going to welcome travellers from the skies..and I'm in 2 minds abt it.. if i do shift again, the distance will just kill moi.. but there are the monetary perks of being on shift together with the luxury of leisure time.. while going to the headquarters will be good exposure and great for career development.. but i'll be a poor church mouse.. yet the irony is.. the posting could already have been decided by some higher being upon the 9th floor.. just that its not announced yet. Aiz.. all that fretting when i got my posting option form was for naught.. for its just a meaningless paper excerise and my gut feel is that I've not been outstanding enough in my 2 years in the organisation. Hence, the urge to move on.. for a fresh start.. esp when you see your pals shining brightly in their careers or doing something they are passion about.. just can't seem to be passionate abt my job.. dah..
Shaks.. i've gotta snap out of this soon.. for what ever will be, will be. Can't help being demoralized a tat bit by the current state of things..Golly.... really gotta stop worrying abt work for the next 9 days at least.. ;p
Sunday, November 05, 2006
5 more Days
5 more days till my long break.. 9 days of vacation leave.. but i must first got thru these 5 days.. a last min emcee assignment when facing any small amt of audience turns me to stone.. my legs to jelly.. oh shit.. wat was i thinking of when i said yes? I should stick to doing something which i my forte..and the national competition on the 10th.. ah.. 5 more long long days.. only saving grace being my meet up session with the gals and the yummy dinner with my collegues..
Saturday, October 14, 2006
abit of everything
Just back from my cruise.. tis 4 days of eating and eating.. and slacking.. yummy local food at Penang.. shopping at central festival in Phuket.. for that 4 days, real life fades , together with the worries of work.. time seems suspended.. and leisure becomes the norm..
travel is an escape from established patterns and you rediscover yourself in the process.. somtimes.. you discover that life can be so simple.. and so simple are the happy things in life.. afterall.. everyone wants to be happy..
i suppose i will be a happie happie gal if i learn to not be so harsh on judging myself for every little mistake that i make.. to learn that its actually all right to be yourself.. tis hard.. sometimes to break away from the confines imposed upon you by society.. and life is present day singapore.. is all about climbing the social ladder, getting a good job.. stablity.. establishing a career.. it seems your life is already mapped from birth..and its scary.. how we are part of our social group.. of our generation.. exibiting the same traits.. chasing after the same thing.. Something knocked into us by the education system here? would i be happie being one of those still buried their work after dusk..? i dunnoe..
perhaps i am disheartened.. by the tough requirements of the work place.. a piece of work you submit.. suddenly becomes the focal point.. just because the project has been shortlisted to represent the dept.. and suddenly you get attention from all the big shots.. and everyone wants to add in their opinions and wat not.. on how to improve the project.. when previously it was a forgone conclusion the the project was unlikely to be selected..amd it was a neglected piece of submission.. now its a prestigious thingy and everyone wans us to do our best..
guess i dun take constructive comments easily although i noe i din put in my all on the project..guess i'm afraid to be judged and found lacking.. maybe i really lack the ability to produce fine work.. i dun feel the passion as i use to, in writing my team papers.. perhaps i should develope passion for my work.. perhaps its just me..to be judged as lacking the ability.. or perhaps....... i am my own biggest judge? for i ponder too much over all areas in which i have not done well..over reflect?!
oh well......... enough rumblings.. if i dun live to work but work to live.. whose's to judge me on my short comings? am i a far less better person if i dun climb the corporate ladder or take eeyons to do so? ha ha.. perhaps i am just not running the right race.. for security is def not my forte..
ha ha.. i wanna travel again.. to escape again.. maybe to somewhere else in S.E.A.. where lifes are simpler.. without the complexities that comes with developement.. ;p
travel is an escape from established patterns and you rediscover yourself in the process.. somtimes.. you discover that life can be so simple.. and so simple are the happy things in life.. afterall.. everyone wants to be happy..
i suppose i will be a happie happie gal if i learn to not be so harsh on judging myself for every little mistake that i make.. to learn that its actually all right to be yourself.. tis hard.. sometimes to break away from the confines imposed upon you by society.. and life is present day singapore.. is all about climbing the social ladder, getting a good job.. stablity.. establishing a career.. it seems your life is already mapped from birth..and its scary.. how we are part of our social group.. of our generation.. exibiting the same traits.. chasing after the same thing.. Something knocked into us by the education system here? would i be happie being one of those still buried their work after dusk..? i dunnoe..
perhaps i am disheartened.. by the tough requirements of the work place.. a piece of work you submit.. suddenly becomes the focal point.. just because the project has been shortlisted to represent the dept.. and suddenly you get attention from all the big shots.. and everyone wants to add in their opinions and wat not.. on how to improve the project.. when previously it was a forgone conclusion the the project was unlikely to be selected..amd it was a neglected piece of submission.. now its a prestigious thingy and everyone wans us to do our best..
guess i dun take constructive comments easily although i noe i din put in my all on the project..guess i'm afraid to be judged and found lacking.. maybe i really lack the ability to produce fine work.. i dun feel the passion as i use to, in writing my team papers.. perhaps i should develope passion for my work.. perhaps its just me..to be judged as lacking the ability.. or perhaps....... i am my own biggest judge? for i ponder too much over all areas in which i have not done well..over reflect?!
oh well......... enough rumblings.. if i dun live to work but work to live.. whose's to judge me on my short comings? am i a far less better person if i dun climb the corporate ladder or take eeyons to do so? ha ha.. perhaps i am just not running the right race.. for security is def not my forte..
ha ha.. i wanna travel again.. to escape again.. maybe to somewhere else in S.E.A.. where lifes are simpler.. without the complexities that comes with developement.. ;p
Sunday, October 01, 2006
Allo 26!!
29th sept..the removal of the little red dot took ten mins.. after the jab i kinda feel nothing.. although i could hear the swlinging of the electric knife cutting at my flash.. the entire surgery was kindda fast and surreal.. my first operation and it was over in a jiffy.. in rectrospect.. the waiting was worse than the actual event.. and i was up and shopping immediately.. splurged on 2 pairs of shoes.. my treat to me self for having survived.. and out tim sum at crystal jade was is good old soul food.. yum.. my chix craws and bittergruad with salted eagg yolks.. lifes great with the removal of the lump .. oh... actually is was more tramatic for my loved ones lah..
had a great time these past few days.. 27th sept.. gelato and pasta at menotti.. forbidden city at esplande.. hee.. jo was great as part of the cast.. i was kindda restless in the first half of the show.. but totally absorb into the story of a concubine who eventually rose to rule china.. my first show atthe esplande.. thanks to the dear one.. his poor pockets are badly burned these past few days.. can't imagine the credit card bills next month..
.. 28th sept.. had dinner with the gals at Aerin's.. the resturant by White Bait and kale's owners.. luved the salad of rocket with sun-dried tomatos and cheese with balsamic vinger dressing.. yummy.. and the mazze platter was nice too.. although my main course of grilled beef with pita bread could have been better.. the mudpie was sinful indulgence..and we blow $150 on the meal.. cheaper than whitebait.. i guess.. catching up with the gals was fun..
.. 30th.. hello 26 and goodbye 25.. its scarey actually.. noeing that the numbers between 30 and 26 are smaller than 25.....the dear naughty boy give me a preszzie.. an anklet.. so pretty with tiny hearts.. woke up late and went shopping.. and dearie treated moi to sizzlers.. hee.. and lots more along the way.. its was a happya day.. work is the furthest thing from my mind these past few days.. yipee...
.. today... the gals came by to visit the post surgery moi.. hee.. aparently i'm a patient newly recoverd.. and they got me fish tonic.. so touched.. and hui's bow tie pasta with cream sauce, porto bello mushrooms was good..hee.. its heart-warming having so many pple who cares abt me..had treat from mum and bro.. and mum's present was a transparent pair of specs.. hope i look good in my new specs.. opps.. its back to work tom.. and worries that i've over indulged for the past few days.. need to lost weight liao.. :)
had a great time these past few days.. 27th sept.. gelato and pasta at menotti.. forbidden city at esplande.. hee.. jo was great as part of the cast.. i was kindda restless in the first half of the show.. but totally absorb into the story of a concubine who eventually rose to rule china.. my first show atthe esplande.. thanks to the dear one.. his poor pockets are badly burned these past few days.. can't imagine the credit card bills next month..
.. 28th sept.. had dinner with the gals at Aerin's.. the resturant by White Bait and kale's owners.. luved the salad of rocket with sun-dried tomatos and cheese with balsamic vinger dressing.. yummy.. and the mazze platter was nice too.. although my main course of grilled beef with pita bread could have been better.. the mudpie was sinful indulgence..and we blow $150 on the meal.. cheaper than whitebait.. i guess.. catching up with the gals was fun..
.. 30th.. hello 26 and goodbye 25.. its scarey actually.. noeing that the numbers between 30 and 26 are smaller than 25.....the dear naughty boy give me a preszzie.. an anklet.. so pretty with tiny hearts.. woke up late and went shopping.. and dearie treated moi to sizzlers.. hee.. and lots more along the way.. its was a happya day.. work is the furthest thing from my mind these past few days.. yipee...
.. today... the gals came by to visit the post surgery moi.. hee.. aparently i'm a patient newly recoverd.. and they got me fish tonic.. so touched.. and hui's bow tie pasta with cream sauce, porto bello mushrooms was good..hee.. its heart-warming having so many pple who cares abt me..had treat from mum and bro.. and mum's present was a transparent pair of specs.. hope i look good in my new specs.. opps.. its back to work tom.. and worries that i've over indulged for the past few days.. need to lost weight liao.. :)
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Just my usual musings
yah... the red dot is still there.. D Day is scheduled for the 29th.. which incidentally I have originally applied for VL.. and my birthday eve.. is gonna be a painful birthday this year..
meet up to shop for han's birthday with hui.. feels great.. the kind of girly chats wif yr fav gal pals..pity i had no time to grab some shoes.. the shoe freak that i am..
attended jaime's wedding at hyatt.. very pretty.. the black tables were kinda cool and the march in by the groom's military pals.. wow.. din know marrying military man has its peaks... Jaime looks every bit the radient bride.. and i'm happy to be with the 97c gang.. we'll be celebrating the golden 10 years next year and golly... we should have a grand celebartion................ everyone's grown up.. and the topics we chat abt has shifted to more adult.. guess its a process very young adult has to go through.. although i believe im still in self denial...
12 more days to my cruise.. can't wait... :)
meet up to shop for han's birthday with hui.. feels great.. the kind of girly chats wif yr fav gal pals..pity i had no time to grab some shoes.. the shoe freak that i am..
attended jaime's wedding at hyatt.. very pretty.. the black tables were kinda cool and the march in by the groom's military pals.. wow.. din know marrying military man has its peaks... Jaime looks every bit the radient bride.. and i'm happy to be with the 97c gang.. we'll be celebrating the golden 10 years next year and golly... we should have a grand celebartion................ everyone's grown up.. and the topics we chat abt has shifted to more adult.. guess its a process very young adult has to go through.. although i believe im still in self denial...
12 more days to my cruise.. can't wait... :)
Thursday, September 21, 2006
the Big red dot
A dot kinda spolit all things this week..
It started fom a small dot.. which slowly grow in size..
A visit to the doc ought to have been one time too many..
Now its gonna be a trip to the operating room...
Worries a flutter..
It sets me wondering..
In the peaceful ordinary.. the next few days was wonderfully mapped..
a baby's birthday
a fre's wedding at a top hotel
a musical at esplande
3 days of celebrations for the big 26
Now... what de..
And i ponder... sometimes its better to live life to the fullest
never wonder the "I should, should not"
never wonder the "wat if"........
Fingers crossed..
Pray for me yah....
It started fom a small dot.. which slowly grow in size..
A visit to the doc ought to have been one time too many..
Now its gonna be a trip to the operating room...
Worries a flutter..
It sets me wondering..
In the peaceful ordinary.. the next few days was wonderfully mapped..
a baby's birthday
a fre's wedding at a top hotel
a musical at esplande
3 days of celebrations for the big 26
Now... what de..
And i ponder... sometimes its better to live life to the fullest
never wonder the "I should, should not"
never wonder the "wat if"........
Fingers crossed..
Pray for me yah....
Friday, September 15, 2006
Time flies
Golly......... its already Sept........ where have the past few months gone? Guess not being able to take leave and having too much ecas at work is kinda overwheming moi...
Gosh.... I'll turn 26 in about 15 days time.. feels kinda ancient... more winkles in the nooks and crannies.. Resolutions aplenty as usual..... I just wanna enjoy life... :my fav sweet talk green tea with jelly.. old chang kee's sardine puff and sotong balls.. plus my current addiction of soya sauce chicken feet.. the dearie always mentions that i have an old auntie's taste buds.. Just gimme my fav food and i'll be a happy gal for the whole day..
Looking forward to the end of the month.. Jaime's wedding..Baby javen's birthday..Forbidden city at esplanade.. meeting up with the girly dearies.. a yearly birthday ritual of renewing the bonds of friendship.. and of course.. celebrating with my froggy prince and family.. yupee.. Can't wait.. time to clear my 20 overdays of leave from last year.. hopefully i'm keping my resolution of enjoying life..... by my definitions... ;p
Gosh.... I'll turn 26 in about 15 days time.. feels kinda ancient... more winkles in the nooks and crannies.. Resolutions aplenty as usual..... I just wanna enjoy life... :my fav sweet talk green tea with jelly.. old chang kee's sardine puff and sotong balls.. plus my current addiction of soya sauce chicken feet.. the dearie always mentions that i have an old auntie's taste buds.. Just gimme my fav food and i'll be a happy gal for the whole day..
Looking forward to the end of the month.. Jaime's wedding..Baby javen's birthday..Forbidden city at esplanade.. meeting up with the girly dearies.. a yearly birthday ritual of renewing the bonds of friendship.. and of course.. celebrating with my froggy prince and family.. yupee.. Can't wait.. time to clear my 20 overdays of leave from last year.. hopefully i'm keping my resolution of enjoying life..... by my definitions... ;p
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Tennis tennis
Yupee... i got myself a tennis racket.. or rather, my dearie boy paid for it.. so tat dah.. I'm the pround owner of a "Prince" tennis racket that costs $94 after discount.. of which dearie can claim $50 from the co. as staff welfare benefits.. Opps.. Its our tennis racket.. although i'm the one using it.. ;p Been playing tennis with the sec gang kinda often.. my arms ache.. but excerise is great for a lazy bum cum tv addict like moi.. having the club membership was a good choice yah..
ha ha.. think im moving into my slack mode.. i no longer aspire to be a high flyer in my job.. like taking a back seat.. performing better than others no longer matter as much.. simply because i realise i dun feel any passion for my job at the moment.. a hard decision to make.. to stay or to move on? the money's stable.. and will be more so.. so its harder to move.. i guess.. and my mummy's advice is that i should stay put.. for wat more can i ask for?.... Oh well.. i'll give myself till the mid of next year to make a choice.. sso im pretty much trying to do other stuff.. like swim.. play tennis .. learn driving .. and many more.. sian.. on course tom..
ha ha.. think im moving into my slack mode.. i no longer aspire to be a high flyer in my job.. like taking a back seat.. performing better than others no longer matter as much.. simply because i realise i dun feel any passion for my job at the moment.. a hard decision to make.. to stay or to move on? the money's stable.. and will be more so.. so its harder to move.. i guess.. and my mummy's advice is that i should stay put.. for wat more can i ask for?.... Oh well.. i'll give myself till the mid of next year to make a choice.. sso im pretty much trying to do other stuff.. like swim.. play tennis .. learn driving .. and many more.. sian.. on course tom..
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Work and more work
Guess my blog must be one of the most neglected ones on cyberspace yah.. have gotten round to getting someone to fix my labtop yet.. must do.. soon.. Life is kinda settled.. used to life without the kakis.. kinda in limbo.. waiting for my next posting.. yet thinking that I could actually get used to the pace of shift work.. the extra allowance is great money for a struggling church mouse like me with a great shopping itch..
Although these days i find myself struggling with my ecas and the extra responsibilities.. i just wanna run away from it all.. life seems peaceful without the add ons in the first year.. sometimes i ponder whether is it worth it? the extras? i really dunnoe.. i guess you can classify me as someone who works to live and not lives to worl.. or at least i have not found my calling in work yet... Oh well.. fingers crossed.. that i can do some HR and training or admin finance .. rather than operations.. which really is not my forte.. Really...
Sian.. leave freeze for the next 3 months... really looking forward to Oct.. i wanna clear all my leave in one shot.. and satisfy my travel lust in the process... Oh well.. its a whole day of course , dialogue and work tom.. Jia you.. to moi.. :)
Although these days i find myself struggling with my ecas and the extra responsibilities.. i just wanna run away from it all.. life seems peaceful without the add ons in the first year.. sometimes i ponder whether is it worth it? the extras? i really dunnoe.. i guess you can classify me as someone who works to live and not lives to worl.. or at least i have not found my calling in work yet... Oh well.. fingers crossed.. that i can do some HR and training or admin finance .. rather than operations.. which really is not my forte.. Really...
Sian.. leave freeze for the next 3 months... really looking forward to Oct.. i wanna clear all my leave in one shot.. and satisfy my travel lust in the process... Oh well.. its a whole day of course , dialogue and work tom.. Jia you.. to moi.. :)
Saturday, March 11, 2006
Proximity Fres & Quarter life crisis
Was supposed to meet collegues for dinner at Brewrekz today and was actually kinda looking forward to it, but Mel was feeling kinda tired so i cancelled as well.. for the thought of forced conversations chills me..esp wif other pple i dun know well.. Am i anti social by natural? just read somewhere abt depression for the young.. how sufferers shut themselves at home and slowly ends up cutting themselves out from the outside world.. Advice given: accept all invitations.. Easy given.. hard to follow. Nah... I'm just feeling down.. Why?
hmm... Work pals come and go.. esp at work where staff are posted ont monthly.. Guess I'm feeling down coz mine kakis at work are posting out tom.. their last day at wlds..I feel fatigue.. in having to form new bonds and making new fres, partially becoz of the speed in posting. I foresee lonely lunches n dinners whereby I will retreat into a corner at the rest room.. no more kopi chat sessions at work.. breakfast breaks. having company made the horrible food bearable.. now? the canteen food simply sucks.. big time.
Proximity fres.. as I have read before.. you become close to them because you are constantly in their company. Its the distance thingy. Once out of sight, out of mind. Reality is sinking in that Mal and Peng are such. many factors to.. peng would be in Charlie.. and that timing i would be meeting dearie and mel would be busy wif her new found romance and the timing would clash to as L is in Alpha. Great foresight tells me that we would never meet .. though mel and peng still can i guess. Perhaps too.. that wall which i have built to protect myself will become thicker will very phrase..
Perhaps that's life.. you meet diff pple during diff points in time.. and to be grateful for that. or perhaps i am sadden too that I've not met up wif han and hui for sometime. Everyone's very busy i guess.. coping wif their jobs, romances . This leaves me to ponder... have the Girly gang i used to call my own , proximity girly pals too? I admit, I dun make fres easily.. unlike the the other pastries who are more extroverted. Hmm.. Guess on the surface, one can indeed seen to have many fres.. but veri little soul mates. Hmm.. am i complaining? or suffering from quarter life crisis again?! Periodically?! Or simply depressed but in self denial?! I miss my uni days wif the Pastries n ens pple.. thankfully at least i have my dearie now..
hmm... Work pals come and go.. esp at work where staff are posted ont monthly.. Guess I'm feeling down coz mine kakis at work are posting out tom.. their last day at wlds..I feel fatigue.. in having to form new bonds and making new fres, partially becoz of the speed in posting. I foresee lonely lunches n dinners whereby I will retreat into a corner at the rest room.. no more kopi chat sessions at work.. breakfast breaks. having company made the horrible food bearable.. now? the canteen food simply sucks.. big time.
Proximity fres.. as I have read before.. you become close to them because you are constantly in their company. Its the distance thingy. Once out of sight, out of mind. Reality is sinking in that Mal and Peng are such. many factors to.. peng would be in Charlie.. and that timing i would be meeting dearie and mel would be busy wif her new found romance and the timing would clash to as L is in Alpha. Great foresight tells me that we would never meet .. though mel and peng still can i guess. Perhaps too.. that wall which i have built to protect myself will become thicker will very phrase..
Perhaps that's life.. you meet diff pple during diff points in time.. and to be grateful for that. or perhaps i am sadden too that I've not met up wif han and hui for sometime. Everyone's very busy i guess.. coping wif their jobs, romances . This leaves me to ponder... have the Girly gang i used to call my own , proximity girly pals too? I admit, I dun make fres easily.. unlike the the other pastries who are more extroverted. Hmm.. Guess on the surface, one can indeed seen to have many fres.. but veri little soul mates. Hmm.. am i complaining? or suffering from quarter life crisis again?! Periodically?! Or simply depressed but in self denial?! I miss my uni days wif the Pastries n ens pple.. thankfully at least i have my dearie now..
Thursday, March 02, 2006
Wonderfully Valentine's
Just felt like thanking my Jing, who made valentine's so sweet and momerable. I appreciate the effort.. although he constantly tells me he is a non-romantic person.. i see the effort.. i really do.. and love the beautiful roses .. pink and purple..and the lovely words on the card. The wonderful dinner at Chimes.. surrounded by soft Candle lights, music, alfesco styled ..slipping Sangria and glazing at him.. life can be so surreal.
Thanks thanks Boy.. for being there for me.. for cheering me up when I am down, for making me laugh and for thinking the world of me.. Only you do.. for I am just an ordinary gal who also happens to be rather lazy.. a slacker and great procrastinator. I promise, in 2006, to to less lazy and I will get down to buying your V.Day gift. Blue Donkey sits by my bedside table.. keeping me comfort in the nights.
March is indeed tiring... being at C. Room and having to deploy so many staff..and having to report to work super early.. A month where my kakis at work will start their second posting.. So hectic.. so many changes... but I look forward to watching "Army Daze" at National Library soon.. and the corporate movie screening.. Plus.. I really must not slack my whole off days away.. I promise.. to fill my life with more forfilling activities. yah?!
Thanks thanks Boy.. for being there for me.. for cheering me up when I am down, for making me laugh and for thinking the world of me.. Only you do.. for I am just an ordinary gal who also happens to be rather lazy.. a slacker and great procrastinator. I promise, in 2006, to to less lazy and I will get down to buying your V.Day gift. Blue Donkey sits by my bedside table.. keeping me comfort in the nights.
March is indeed tiring... being at C. Room and having to deploy so many staff..and having to report to work super early.. A month where my kakis at work will start their second posting.. So hectic.. so many changes... but I look forward to watching "Army Daze" at National Library soon.. and the corporate movie screening.. Plus.. I really must not slack my whole off days away.. I promise.. to fill my life with more forfilling activities. yah?!
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Hmmm.... hello 2006?
Not really a great way to kick start 2006...and my first entry of the year.. been feeling kinda sluggish... Work is okay.. settled and bonding well wif Melody and Sis Peng.. for me.. life's great.. starting to invest.. work is on track.. i am happy wif my dearie.. and i get to sleep tons on my off days... only sadness tinggling me would be the fact that Meloday and Peng plus the gang of robin and cedric have all gotten their posting preference... ie.. they will be posted out soon... hump.. kindda sad to noe that my kakis for Kopi breaks and gossip sessions are leaving doon.. by Apr.. remour has it.. and then some will be at HQ and others at extreme ends of the island.. seems like most things in life gets rather transient... oh well... I'll be posting out end 2006 or bend 2007 too...
that aside.. wat mekes me melocronic this feb day is the news that one of my JC fres passed away today.. of Cancer.. yah.. we sort of expected him to leave soo... he looked so frail and was struggling with every breathe he takes... he had looked totally a diff .. worn out version of his former self... burkets of tears had been shed the last time we visted him in the hospic... a young man amindst the other older Cancer patients... but weirdly... today i only feel a slight tingle of sadness... and i was thinking.. maybe life can be so simple after all.. to lower down my expectations.. to have time to smell the air of fallen after the rain.. to so the many things i hold dear.. to confrom less to societal demands... and be proactive in doing the things i've always wanted to do.. for myself and for my beloved ones.. i wanna take time to tell them how much i value their presence in my life... would my existence in life be tangible? would pple remember me ? Melody has also have had expereince great sadness in her life when her loved one left her after a short short moment which they shared together... hmm... but i guess... in the end... all sadness gets washed away with the passenge of time..no?!
that aside.. wat mekes me melocronic this feb day is the news that one of my JC fres passed away today.. of Cancer.. yah.. we sort of expected him to leave soo... he looked so frail and was struggling with every breathe he takes... he had looked totally a diff .. worn out version of his former self... burkets of tears had been shed the last time we visted him in the hospic... a young man amindst the other older Cancer patients... but weirdly... today i only feel a slight tingle of sadness... and i was thinking.. maybe life can be so simple after all.. to lower down my expectations.. to have time to smell the air of fallen after the rain.. to so the many things i hold dear.. to confrom less to societal demands... and be proactive in doing the things i've always wanted to do.. for myself and for my beloved ones.. i wanna take time to tell them how much i value their presence in my life... would my existence in life be tangible? would pple remember me ? Melody has also have had expereince great sadness in her life when her loved one left her after a short short moment which they shared together... hmm... but i guess... in the end... all sadness gets washed away with the passenge of time..no?!
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