When it hits ya it hits ya

Some mentality that we have about things we carry wif us our whole life..expecting it to remain the same for ever and ever..then something happens..it forces you to rethink..re-evaluate...whether to let yourself try...without trying you will never know..but do you really ever want to know? something that starts out beautifully may not end beautifully...a coward...thats what I am..to me..each step is a difficult step..why? comfort zone...to get out of your comfort zone exposes you to new changes..new risks..but maybe you can reap rewards beyond your imagination..so the issue here...is that there is really no issue..sometimes things move at such a fast speed that you are caught unprepared...so you go wif the flow..swept away by the currents...and you just can hope that you dun drown in the process. If you stop to let yourself think..you start to question too much...to worry too much..and you will never allow yourself to make that jump..to have the chance to get to the other side of the river..hmm..wonder how does the other side look like..hmm..

there's sad and there's sadness

what's life and why is it so complex at times?..Was rather angry at my uncle for some issue he had wif my mum..and both sides of the family became quite distant..so when i received news that he suffered a stroke..think it was this invisible wall that acted as a shield against any emotions..but...my wall started to crumble when i heard that my aunt actually hit him because of money matters..never can image that such a thing could happen..that someone would actually attack a defendless person..the scarey thing is that the person should have been the one closest to ya..hmm..leaves you wondering about the choices that we make in life..the people we meet in life..and my own reaction to the whole thing...drama drama drama..life can be such a big drama at times..to have this invisible wall acting as a shield i have come to realise..protects ya against all emotions...when this wall crambles...your defences are slowly being eaten away..and you become vulnerable...you cry buckets..you remember the affection he has show ya...and you empathise..when that happens..you wanna step in to do something..and then you realise that there is so little you can do...so you start feeling useless all over again..life...as it is.. we make our choices ...once the bed has been made...its your bed..and me? I'm making mine..and standing beside yours.